New Year, New You - Ways to make your 2025 resolutions stick.

Have you ever made a New Year’s resolution only to find yourself slipping back into old habits by February? Maybe you bought that fancy journal, vowed to exercise daily, or promised to cook more meals at home. If this sounds familiar, you’re not the only one. Most people abandon their resolutions within the first few weeks of the year. But what if 2025 could be different?

As a neuropsychologist, I’ve seen how the tools used in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) can transform these hopeful promises into lasting habits. Let’s talk about how you can make your resolutions a reality.

Why Resolutions Often Fail

Think about how packed the gym is in January. By March, it’s nearly empty again. The truth is, nearly 80% of people abandon their New Year’s resolutions by February according to a recent Psychology Today article. This pattern repeats year after year and it’s not because of a lack of willpower – it’s because we often approach habit formation the wrong way. 

We set big goals, expect instant results, and give up at the first sign of failure. It’s easy to feel discouraged when you’ve tried and failed before. But here’s the good news: change is possible with the right approach. You’re not automatically doomed to repeat the past. With a better understanding of how habits form and how to manage setbacks, you can create lasting change.

How does CBT factor in? 

Understanding Your Thought Patterns

Think of CBT as a mental toolkit for change. Just as a carpenter needs specific tools to build a house, you need the right tools to build lasting habits. CBT offers strategies like reframing unhelpful thoughts, developing achievable goals, and practicing mindfulness to keep you on track.

Breaking Down Common Thought Traps

Consider these common thoughts:

• "I’ve failed before so I’ll probably fail again."

• "I need to change everything at once."

• "If I slip up once, I might as well give up."

These are examples of cognitive distortions, or thought patterns that misrepresent reality. The good news is that CBT teaches you how to challenge and replace these unhelpful thoughts with more productive ones.

Let’s take the ever so classic gym example. Who here has ever thought, “If I miss one workout, I’m a failure.” I’m raising my hand. How can CBT help? We can reframe this as “Missing one workout doesn’t erase my progress. I can pick up where I left off tomorrow.” This shift can keep you motivated instead of hopping on a one-way train into defeat.

Creating Lasting Habits Through CBT

Start Small, Think Big

Instead of declaring, "I’ll exercise every day," try, "I’ll walk for 10 minutes after lunch." This can be applied to other scenarios too. Let's say you’re trying to eat healthier. Rather than overhauling your whole diet overnight, consider starting by committing to one balanced meal per day. CBT shows us that small, achievable goals create positive feedback loops in the brain. This makes it easier to stick to new habits over time.

The Action Strategy

Here’s a step-by-step approach to turning resolutions into reality:

1. Identify your goal – Be specific about what you want to achieve. For instance, turn “I want to read more” into “I’ll read one chapter before bed.”

2. Break it into tiny, manageable steps – Start small to build momentum. For example, read one page a day instead of trying to finish a book in a week. Don't worry, there is room for reading more than a page if you get on a roll!

3. Create specific intentions – Decide when, where, and how you’ll act, such as "I’ll stretch in my bedroom for 5 minutes right after waking up."

4. Monitor your thoughts and adjust as needed – Recognize and reframe unhelpful thoughts like "I’ll never keep this up" into "I’ve already made progress and can keep building on it."

Making It Work in Real Life

Let me share Angie’s story (name changed for privacy). Angie came to me feeling stuck. She hadn’t had a string of failed resolutions but often found herself losing steam and getting frustrated when she tried to create structure in her life. She just wanted to feel like she had her stuff together as much as possible.

At first, Angie struggled with an all-or-nothing mindset. She set high expectations and felt frustrated when things didn’t go as planned. We worked on identifying what tripped her up (like feeling pressured by time or being too hard on herself) and focused on shifting these thought patterns into more realistic and supportive ones.

How Angie Got On A Roll 

We focused on small, actionable steps that felt manageable for Angie. She wanted to feel more organized and in control of her life, but getting started was frustrating because she felt overwhelmed. So instead of doing a complete overhaul of her routine, Angie worked on one habit she cared about: setting aside time each evening to plan her next day.

At first it felt really hard for her to stick with the new habit. Some nights, she forgot to plan or was too tired to do it. But by pairing her planning routine with something she already did (like winding down with a cup of tea), she found it easier to remember. Over time, planning became more automatic. Angie noticed that her mornings were smoother and this helped to set a good tone for her day.

There will continue to be days when things don’t go as planned. Life can be unpredictable for any of us. I still meet with Angie. She isn’t shy about telling me when her schedule goes off track. However, the CBT strategies she’s practiced help her regroup faster and focus on what’s within her control. Instead of giving up, she reminds herself that tomorrow is a fresh opportunity to try again.

What’s the moral of this little story? Small but consistent efforts and giving yourself some grace can keep you moving forward - even when things don’t go perfectly.

The Science of Habit Formation

Research shows that it takes an average of 66 days to form a new habit … but this range can actually vary widely. We’re talking from as little as 18 days to as long as 254 days. This info comes from a 2009 study led by Phillippa Lally and published in the European Journal of Social Psychology. The key is to be as patient and consistent as you can as you work toward your goal.

Key Components of Successful Habit Formation

• Cue: Create reminders in your space (e.g., leaving your workout clothes by your bed).

• Routine: Establish consistent patterns like exercising at the same time daily.

• Reward: Celebrate small wins. Try writing your wins out on your calendar. It feels great!

• Repetition: Practice regularly to reinforce your new habit.

Maintaining Momentum

Setbacks will happen but they do not equal failure. Think of them as opportunities to learn and adjust. When you slip up try using this CBT tip:

The ABCD Method

1. Activating event – What happened?

2. Beliefs about the event – Challenge unhelpful interpretations like, "I’ll never get back on track," by recognizing that missing a step doesn’t define your success.

3. Consequences of these beliefs – Notice how your thoughts impact your feelings and actions.

4. Dispute unhelpful thoughts – Replace them with constructive alternatives like, "I can use this experience to improve my approach going forward." 

Moving Forward

As we approach 2025, remember that lasting change isn’t about willpower – it’s about having the right strategy. Using CBT strategies doesn’t just help you set goals—it gives you a long-lasting way to grow and succeed.

What’s The Plan?

1. Choose one meaningful goal – Focus on what truly matters to you.

2. Write down potential obstacles – Anticipate challenges and plan for them.

3. Plan specific responses to challenges – Stay proactive.

4. Track your progress without judgment – Celebrate every step forward (even if the steps seem small).

Make 2025 Your Year

Change doesn’t happen overnight, but with CBT, you can create habits that stick. Start small, focus on one goal, and give yourself grace when things don’t go as planned. Progress isn’t about perfection—it’s about showing up for yourself and trying again.

What’s one small step you can take toward a goal that matters to you? Write it down. Or reach out if you’d like personalized support. Whether it’s building better habits or learning how to bounce back from setbacks, these are things that are within your skill set.

Lastly, remember that every step forward (no matter how big or small), is a win. I wish you all a happy, healthy, and productive 2025.